3 cities again.

today, 30th June.
will be one of those days that i'll have my meal in 3 cities again.

breakfast in Medan.
lunch in Batam.
dinner in Singapore.


gonna be tiring.....





lots of things to settle.



















shall go and start packing now !













.singapore.
tomorrow

unknown bugs 2

so it's gonna be tomorrow.
damn it.
seriously don't know how the hell to bring my stuff over.

things to bring over :

1. camera bag.
2. tripod inside the tripod bag.
3. laptop.
4. 1 luggage for my clothes.
5. 1 box for my dry box.

all heavy stuff.
god damn it.


































































































































love this best,
if only the eyes are in focus !


























































now i need more practice.

















thanks to those who ask why :)

unknown bugs 1

it's always best to be behind the camera shooting.
under the hot striking sun.
it made me forget bout everything else.
the only one thing i love doing.
get in the field.
and start looking for my victims.



oh yeah,
i bought a new fone :)






































































































































































not entirely satisfied with the way i shot them.
still sucks when shooting handheld.
need more practise uh...


damn the electricity supply in medan.
screw u PLN.

off watching movie again.

off.

i hate this kind of feeling,
and it always happens when i'm leaving home for singapore.
i'm making myself busy,
bought more than 20 dvds to spend my time with.
and i just found out that there's a low-production poser movie for the transformers called TRANSMORPHERS.
WTH ?
it's also about machines attacking the human race,
and i just found that out when i saw the big tittle across my screen.
damn it.

okay, i'm off.
for a few days may be.

behind the smile.

this is going to be an emo entry.







there's so much inside i don't know where to start.
i think it is one of those times when u're really down.
u don't know what to do,
u lost appite in eating,
nothing seems good anymore,
u can't find any reason to smile no more,
u feel like the whole world is against u...

yeah...i'm feeling that way right now.

it's sad,
the heart is crying every minute of the day.
and nobody is there to listen.

i don't have a mum like yours.
the only conversation we talk revolve around the topic "money".
my dad don't listen either.
there's no way i can talk my heart out with dad..
we only talk about business.
and how he has write my future out.
what am i suppose to do and how am i gonna do it.
i can't talk with my friends.
in fact, i don't even have a friend who i can sit down with and talk my heart out.
and share everything under the sun about me.
i can't tell her how i'm feeling,
i don't want her to worry.
especially during these times.
when i have only 1 week away to leave this place for at least a good 5 months.

and i just realise...
that there's actually nobody,
nobody in this god damn world who really knows me inside out.
who truly understand me,
heck..
i'm someone who's hard to be understood.
i myself find don't understand me at times...
let's just say,
that there's no one,
who can sit down and write out more than 20 things that i enjoy doing that's true.

but it's not their faults.
it's me.

i can't say what's in my heart.
i don't share how i feel.


u know,
it's getting harder to live,
in a world where u're getting further away from the person u love.
i have a brother who is so pampered by my parents he had become so childish that i can't stand him.
i know he loves me.
i love you too.
thou we seldom talk.
i don't know what u're facing and u never know what i'm doing.
i have a sister whom i love so much i'd die for her.
and it's my own fault that i never take the chance to talk to her.
to go to her room and spend time with her.
cause most of the time i'm locked up in my room doing things for myself.
and now that she'd be gone too.
it'd be too late when she returns.

and it aches me now.






and when i come back again,
i'd just be even further away from them.

i know u're trying hard girl,
i'm sorry.








nobody listens.
nobody understands.
and here is the person who's trying to be everything that they wish for.
and fails most of the time.




behind my smile,
u'd see a heart.
who's always crying.
for the countless mistakes he had made.
and for the person that he is.

painting with light

that's what i've been up to lately,
but still fail miserably.

been really busy.
lots of things to settle.
will be back to sg on the 30th.

the final splash.

wtf ?
my blogger speaks bahasa indonesia ?

my life photography and design

Lihat Blog

369 Posting, terakhir diterbitkan pada 2007 Jun 19

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me indonesia no good,
bole change back to bahasa english ?
i don't remember me changing my language setting.













i've sent the pic.


decided to send this one.




there have been lots of splash pics taken from the top and its sides.
decided to send the one that's a little bit different.
from a low angle point of view.



not feeling really well,
emotionally.




laterz.

me myself and the camera.

bored late last night,
i decided to try the lights on people,
me.
since i guess i'm suppose to shoot the band saint virus once again.
i wanted to give it a try first on how it'd look like.
so there i go,
setting up the 2 cheap lights.
put on my 580ex on the camera,
take out my tripod.
and an RC.
then,
SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT.
and here's what i got.












#1















#2


















#3
















#4













somehow,
it kinda got the feel that it's shot in a studio.
well, it didn't.
i used some light yellowish wall as the background :)












dri said that i'm suppose to get a pic of myself with my camera to send in to the mag,










i think this snapshot is okay =P













i think this will be the one i'm sending in,















comments on the colours ?





click HERE for the 1024px version of it.











ps : i've just upgraded to adobe photoshop cs3 !!!
special thanks to zc for making it possible :)

water, part 2

okay so i played more with water.
means the selection adds on.
from yesterday's,
i believe the blue ones are better.
now i present,
the black ones :)































here are the two abstract art i did with water :)
































and






























another those blue crystal splash






























okay, two more :)






























last blues


































final pic :)









































and i need to eat more,
and start exercising.
thou most of my pants can't seem to fit no more,
i'm still feeling damn skinny.
= i used to be super duper skinny !
OMG !

water, part 1

dri asked me to send in one of my water pics to a mag in malaysia.
he asked me to send "the blue splash"
but i'm not entirely satisfied with that shot.
so i begin playing with water a few days ago.
the water series will have 3 parts of it.
firstly are those normal droplets with my experimental lightings.
the second will be abstracts art i did with water.
last will be water, when played around with photoshop.




























no flash were used in today's pics.
just 2 normal external lights.





























getting them in focus is super hard man.
for the vert shots,
i literally had to lie down flat on my bathroom floor to see the viewfinder and keep on re-focusing.
it paid off i believe.






























help me see which one u like best !




























well, i personally feel these two are the best !














"from the top"















"double the drop"













:D

despite the attack.

i went back to "gudang" for more macros the other day,
this time with a tripod.
a long sleeve shirt.
jeans.
and a shoe.






























despite all that,
i'm still attacked by countless of mosquitoes.
by the end of the super short session,
i've got attacks on my face and hands.































i took just about less than 20 pics during the 2 hours i was there.
most of the time i was there looking at grasshoppers.
when i began approaching them,
they jumped away.

































i spent at good 20 mins sitting motionless trying to get them to come near me,
i agree,
when a macro enthusiast i met the other day at the singapore botanic garden said this,
"macro is even more tiring than tennis man"
i believe so.





























there was a point of time where i was sitting among the grass,
surrounded by about 10 dragonflies flying all around me,
the world seems to be at peace.
and that's why i love photography.
we tend to experience things not every normal people does.
it was a really beautiful sight.
unfortunately to me,
they just kept flying and flying non stop.
super hard to take pic of them.
after some time,
i decided to put my cam down and just enjoy the moment.


soon, it started to drizzle and i unpack my gears and head back home.

i guess i'll be gg back there soon.
this time,
with an insect repellent.

over 3 months.

it's over 3 months.
and i feel like i'm falling in love with you all over again.
we've been tru the rough and good times.
and i'm glad we made it till today.
and i'm really happy with the way things are now.

so...




let me hold your hand.
and hold on to mine.
and let's walk tru this journey.
together.


with love,
b.

specially for you,
f.

singapore - batam 12/06

these are my last shots with my beloved sony dsc t-30.
why ?
i'm giving it away for the old canon ixus 400
yes,
ixus 400
the 4MP big bulky "compact" camera.
i gave my sony to my sis.































it was a sunny and gloomy morning.
my sony performed beyond my expectations.
and at that moment,
i know i bought the right compact camera.
i know...
that will be the one to give to my sis.

































thou it was with me for less than a year,
the 8924 shots it had fired under my shutter finger and my friends' had been great.
there was no one time that i regretted having it with me.































it was the very first compact cam that i purchased with my savings.
costing about $800+ with an extra batt and a 1gb memory card.
i loved it the moment it fires its first shot.





























thou it's capabilities sometimes let me down a little,
i was glad i took it out for my last few shots on the ferry that morning.





























man...i'm so gonna miss it.
































hope it performs as well as it did for me to my sis.































now i have two canon cameras : /




























thank you my sony.