Thursday, June 30, 2005

school and life been tough, tiring.

i used to go around by car back there.or at least, a motorbike.i only use my feet for movin around the house and that's all.
now it's got to be walkin walkin walkin walkin and walkin man.

this is the walkings i do to go to the east.
must walk to bus stop
den from bus stop must walk to mrt station
den from mrt station must walk out to the other bus stop
then from that bus stop must walk to whatever destination i'm going
singapore is full of walkin man
just 2 days and my feet are aching as if i've got some rhymatic disease.

school will start this friday
and like wtf.i have school from monday to saturday too !
na bueh
anyways, it's all lecture
my fuckin timetable doesn't have any tutorial in it
everyday 9.30 to 12.30 lecture
with a tea break within and snacks provided by the school.
3 subjects this semester.
business communication
principle of accounting
principle of management

man....really need to study my accounts
jia lat


life in singapore ain't the easy man
singaporeans are different
let's talk bout character.

i was in the mrt today from dover to paya lebar on my way meetin cz.
what i witnessed really fucked me up.
and i fuckin swore i won't wanna grow old in this city man.
no offence to other singaporeans
but fuck the whoeva singaporeans that's gonna be in my account below.
i was in the mrt, packed with school students and office workers.also, a few grannies and granpas. i was leaning against the entrance door.really no place to sit.and i don't fuckin mind at all.even though my fuckin feet hurt like shit.even my feet shouted out for me to find a place to sit.i still said to myself, the eldery here would have needed those sit much more than i do.
then as we reached a station, a really old granny came in.silver hair and all.she was walkin in as quick as her feet could take but yet carefully..towards a vacant seat near me.and u know what...
a fuckin teenager boy snatched it from her.and i think the fuckin boy knew that the granny was walkin towards the seat.all she could do was to stand in front of him in that's fucked up.
then there's another old aunty standin close to me.old.quite old.and was holdin 2 bags of what it seemed to be damn heavy groceries.i offered to help help her carry her bags.she just turned me down as if i was gonna take her groceries and run.
like wtf is wrong wif singaporeans ?

my new home would be the west for the next 3 years or so.
i'm kinda gettin use to livin alone eh.....
next will be the washings
weh weh weh........

ps. jack : ga ada tlp rumah lah.mana ada enak sabtu ni wa ntar ganti no wa lagi.ganti ke no yg tetap.ntar w sms d. klo mau call harus tamba no idd 017 klo ga salah.baru tekan no hp w.u tanya via lah no iddnya apa.take care man.cut down those drinkings.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

singapore at last

....finally in singapore.....

guess i have to expect a lot of change from myself....


found a place for rent at last. a room big enough for two people.
movin in tml.
i don't fucking know what the fuck is actually wrong with me.
am i just homesick ?
or do i just simply miss her so much ?
or what ?
but i kept feelin this burden behind me.
like i'm lifting a fucking billion tonnes of weight at my back.
lookin forward to this friday.
school starts !
will be on a fuckin budget life for the rest of my 3 years here....
really need to change a lot man...
fuck it.
don't know what's exactly racing in my mind
don't know what other words could possibly explain what i'm feelin now when in the first fucking place i don't even understand what the fuck is actually in my brain.what the fuck am i feeling.but it just ain't good.

miss you j.
a lot...
more than words can ever describe.
more than words can ever say.
need u badly beside me.

Friday, June 24, 2005

oh life.....

everything was going on so fucking well between the both of us...
even dad has closed his eyes on my relationship this time
showing me a fucking good positive respond about my relationship with her...
dad has agreed
till last night

i held a farewell party for 8 people.all my close friends, couples.
and like....of course we slept
i mean...i share a room with j.only the both of us.and slept for only a fucking hour
and my mum found out.told dad.
and i think both of them is fuckin angry bout my behaviour
all the while...they think that i'm fuckin not serious bout her
all this while my father thought that i'm a fuckin pimp.
i'm just waitin for a lecture from dad as soon as he returns from work today
mum has been acting normal.
my greatest fear is that they are disappointed with her.
a good girl would not anyhow sleep with people.
the thing that they don't know is that she's already my gf.
and we did nothing.

i confirm will get there this sunday.reaching singapore by 5p.m.
that'll be the 26th.
dion will fetch me and may be we'll then have dinner or something.
thus, that day i can't go out.i'll be straight away at clementi.
27th - need to report to SIM for my student visa.
and also go for a medical check up.
i guess that'll that the whole day and depending on which hospital should i go...i might be able to meet you guys.
28th - look around for a room nearby for rent.
29th - look around for a room nearby for rent...this day then i might be able to go out for a little while.
30th - orientation....
and so on.......
and so forth.......

missing you j.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

i'm already an SIM member.

SIM had just sent me a letter...
the letter was sent on the 1st of this month and i only recieve them yesterday.
like what the fuck is with indonesia's postal service uh ?

i'm fuckin lookin forward for school now lo
don't know why
just wanna feel busy with books again.words....

my brain just can't stop thinkin unneccassary thoughts bout what she and i.
miss u j.

Monday, June 13, 2005

together at last...

we're together at last
thank god
and thank the meteor that fulfilled my wish
though only one of it is fulfilled.
another one is yet to come.

i can't promise u a lot of thing j
and i can't promise to always be there when u need me.
but i want to start a new life dear.
and there's noone else but you that i want to be with.
right now
and till when...only god knows.

i am not me anymore.
i feel different.

a mere two weeks we've got left.
and i wish that i could just spend every single seconds left with you right by me j.
i don't even fuckin knw why i'm feelin all this
and i don't even fuckin understand why did i do all those things for you
but believe me...those are true and fuckin upmost from my heart gal.
never had i sacrifice as much shit as i had for you
believe in what i said for i know...i'll make those come true no matter what happens.
u are the only one right here in me right now.tomorrow and god knows till when.

and fuck the rest of the shits that's happenin right in me for i don't fuckin give a fuckin fuck about it.
i just don't fuckin understand why it's you.
i myself can't fuckin believe that it'll be you.
but fuck it all.
i'm givin u my upmost trust.

i know words don't fuckin mean anything
but i just wanna say
that i do
that i do
wanna be with you every single fuckin second of my days here
that i really do
loves you.

and i thank you for accepting me in your life dear.

Monday, June 06, 2005

the best time on earth...

been havin the best times of my life....
no doubt, she sometimes just crushed my heart into pieces again but least i'm havin a fuckin good time with my friends.

she just left me thinkin.....
are all those that i've been doin worth it ?
screw it.i'm still gonna do it anyway

went to the beach yesterdae
got me chau ta...fuckin tanned
and now whole body pain
reminds me of canoeing days....

pics :

- coming soon -

fuckin internet connection damn slow
gonna use the wireless tml
thus, upload tml