SIM

school
wo hoo....very near
1st july - comin soon !

man...this is how i got myself into SIM

one fine saturday night.

dad : " so, u sure the polys won't accept u ?"
me : "don't know lah...sure won't one lah"
dad : " then what...u cannot possibly continue ur studies here.u can't even understand the newspaper here for nuts"
me : " don't know lah " ( in an annoyed tone )
dad : " how can u everything also don't know don't konw...it's ur future and bla bla bla bla bla " ( starts nagging )
me : " i already tried my best lah...still cannot then what can i do " ( a lil fucked up )
dad : " i heard there's this "schools exhibition" in tiara conventional hall "
me : " k la...i go now " ( i was tired but i just wanna escape )
dad : " u betta go right away...don't go else where...must know what's more important than what "
me : " YA LAAAAA "

and off i go...to my friend's house.
i was fucked up.
i was damn sure no polys will accept me which is true. they all said
"sorry...your 'don't know what fuck' is unsuccessful"
i was fuckin stressed up.
i was motherfuckin lost.
i don't know what else to do.
i can't possibly start work now.
i still wanna study !
i'm still not ready for the fucked up workin world and i don't think i will ever be.

anyway..after stopin at my friend's house for some fucked up times...i eventually went there. surveyed the area.
they offered quite a few schools la.
inti uni in malaysia
monash uni in m'sia
SIM which i didn't even stop by and ask for info
and many more....
went home with thoughts of goin to monash.follow andrias there.
at least i'll still have a fren dere la.
and even more fucked up thoughts about my future.

the next day, dad and i went to the convention hall again.went around.asked around.and there we was...stopin at SIM and talked....
fuckin expensive.
so we went home...dad was already plannin on sendin me off to KL.
okay...now i have a light of future.
but a fuckin degree form KL will do no good.went to sleep with even more fucked up thoughts.
i'm a person who SERIOUSLY FUCKINGLY THINK A LOT...WAY FUCKIN TOO MUCH...
and thus, had a sleepless night.
next morning...dad called tellin me that SIM will be a better choice.
asked me to go to the convention hall AGAIN to ask for even more information and if i'd be accepted with my results.so off again i went.this time with my fuckin embarrasssin o level results.
got back with even more fuckin questions ringing my head.
so expensive. now business so fucked up.and i begin to think that i'll be fuckin selfish if i were to still go. selfish as in....dad will have to work extra hard.mum will be stressed out with the decreasin financial...bro and sis would be able to buy more things..as in spend more.
i compared the cost for monash uni and SIM. it's :
4 years in monash + accomondation = SIM 1 year
which equally means
1 fuckin degree in monash = i fuckin diploma from SIM

it was paranoid.

talked to dad about the cost and all.and still dad insists that i continue in singapore on the condition that i will have to REALLY STUDY and of course not spend unneccasary money which means no more CDs, no more wakin up late den have to taxi to sch and which also definitely means that i'll have to STUDY SUPER EXTRA HARD for accounts.

then i was accepted liao.
funny.
i don't even know WHERE THE FUCK THIS SCHOOL IS !!
i don't even know THEY EXISTED TILL THIS FUCKIN YEAR
and yes.like i've expected.
i'll live somewhere near the school. which is at clementi.
a whole new fuckin environment.
4+ years in singapore and i don't even think i've ever step on clementi before.

but however, i'm still lookin forward to it.
i know everythin will be new...
no more wakin up late ( no slpin late )
no more car ( this especially )
no more nothin to do time
no more slackin the whole fuckin day in front of the tv and have a movie marathon that exploded my speakers.
no more hangin out with backstabbers, untrustworthy, assholic friends ( exclude my cousin, jack, aman and a few more )
no more poolin anytime i want
no more secret trips to brastagi and the beach...
no more jilly
no more mum's naggin
no more discussin business wif dad.
no more foolin ard shoppin malls as if they were mine
no more disturbin unknown girls
no more "my paradise" ( that's the name of my room k )
no more sleepin anytime i want....have i mentioned this ?

MAN !! I'M SO GONNA MISS ALL THIS !!
i've gone tru so much shit this year ( from last march till this march ) that sometimes i feel like escaping away...feel like startin afresh.
may be this is the time.
15 months of diploma in management studies
2 or may be 3 years more of a degree in business admin ( marketin ) or marketin
den work 2 years - save - another dunno how many years for mba
den buy a house in singapore
work a few more years - save -
come back medan for good wif savings.
start a business back home
marry
have kidsss
and die in peace

if this is gonna happen...i'd be 40 when i'm married
WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
that's a fuckin no way for my mum...

once i told mum that i'll only get married when i'm over 32 and she starts naggin about dunno what which indirectly means that she'll want me to have babies soon (definitely after i can earn my own bux )

so yeah...1 year in medan
and i feel i'm more social now.as in....i'm more ready to start a conversation with strangers anytime any place. which is a good thing for me.

learned what friends really means
miss u guys
and i will buy the balls when i have $$.